The Wheel of Time: Book 5 (1)

THERE

WILL

BE

SPOILERS

  • Woman, observing a queen: welp, now that she’s got a man – something I know because she’s “showing too much bosom” – she’ll probably lash out in jealousy toward every woman around her. I better be careful, since when women take lovers they lose the ability to do anything but bang him and get jealous that other people might bang him.
  • Every attractive man is “tall, deep chested, darkly handsome” and, often but not always “with wings of gray at his temples.”
  • Women are frequently “used to men looking at them,” but not even once have any problem at all – even mild discomfort – with it.
  • Advice:
    – From men he’s just met: So wise. OMG
    – From a woman who’s helped him from the beginning: She’s trying to manipulate me!
  • Listening to a long explanation about how men are physically stronger than women and that for some fucking reason correlates one-to-one with magical strength and it takes two women to equal one man because even when it comes to FUCKING MAGIC they are dainty little flowers.
  • Oh, the only brown people are the race of whores? Sure. Why the fuck not, at this point?
  • “She was older than he, maybe by 10 years, but that had never put him off.” That would make this woman about 26. 26. How good of him to overlook her advanced age. OF TWENTY-SIX. And now is the time when I point out that Lan is probably a solid 20 years older than Nynaeve.
  • “He had never seen an Aiel wear baubles of any type, but in his experience all women liked jewelry.” Even deadly, terrifying mother fuckers who literally do nothing with their lives but fight people with spears.

I can’t take it. I can’t take it. I’m switching to the summaries until book 11. I’m sorry.

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